New Year, New Rituals: Self-Care Tips

As my life changes, the one constant remains; self care is my life line. Without it many of us, including myself, begin to sink. With mounting responsibilities and a desire for rest, it can become difficult to imagine adding another ritual to your life. But the ritual of self care is paramount. It offers rejuvenation and respite. I often refer to self care as a break for the brain. It's easy to train our brain to be mindful of our worries. It takes consistency and intention to train our brains to be mindful in self care. I'd like to offer some easy new year tips to reinvigorate a new or old self care practice you've been meaning to do.

The most accessible self care ritual is the breath. Just breathe. There are many people in my life and practice that do not often notice how long they go without an exhale. When you breathe in, your belly should expand as to make room for the inhale. Then gently collapse as you expel air from your lungs.  Practice 60 seconds of intentional breathes each day. You do not need an app for this. Just plug in a simple reminder in your phone, a sticky on your car visor, or hand written note on the bathroom mirror. Sixty seconds daily. That's all it takes to train the brain to begin to take care of itself. 

Meditate often. Most of us who are seeking mindfulness in everyday life are not self identified Buddhist monks. You do not have to be sitting on a small pillow with your legs crossed to meditate. You can do it anywhere: the shower, car, office, classroom, gym, and in the DMV.  Meditation can manifest in the form of prayer as well. Prayer is intentional and focused. Prayer can create a stillness for people to grasp or acknowledge emotions that have been put to the wayside. Acknowledging and caring for your emotions can be a powerful form of self care; especially for those who often here messages regarding the burden and or lack of value that their emotions hold.

However, if you find you are someone who is using self care to harness overwhelming emotions try a mindful behavioral practice like walking. Walking mindfulness is simple.  Just notice the sensations as you walk. Be intentional in every step. Notice the softness of the rug you are stepping on; or the firmness of the ground beneath your toes; notice the muscles stretch as you balance each step from heal to toe. Find a sense of groundedness through the connection between your feet and the earth. Give your brain a break from the overwhelm of emotions and create intentional focus on your body.

Sleep well. Yes, I know this is a difficult commandment. Sleep can absolutely be a form of self care.  Sleep is not earned. Sleep is a right and necessity. But be careful, anxiety and depression, or other difficult emotions can send signals to your brain to under or over sleep. So to sleep well, you must understand what kind and the amount of sleep which is most effective for your body. In this case, you may need to conduct your own sleep study. Track your mood and sleep for a week, and notice what works. By intentionally setting a tone for good sleep hygiene practices,  you will be caring for your body and brain, thus contributing effectively to emotion regulation and increased distress tolerance. Moreover, managing emotions can lead to increased satisfaction in interpersonal and intrapersonal relationships.

To continue on the path toward promoting mind-body connection through self care, consider giving your body the opportunity to move in water. If you feel emotionally and physically safe in water try using a warm bath, cool pool, or nearby ocean shore with gentle waves to move in water. Water has a beautiful history of healing powers. Moving in water to wash away suffering can become a healing experience. Or moving in large waters to feel smaller and surrounded can offer a sense of safety. The experience of buoyancy while floating in water can lead to a sense of relief from cumbersome burden or heaviness in your life. Whatever you obtain from moving in water, let it be rejuvenating.

Self care using nature is also an option. Taking a hike to a nearby river, or no where at all is a perfect distraction from the everyday hustle. Hiking does not have to be strenuous to be fruitful. Find a hiking loop at your local reservoir, park or marina. During this time,  use your senses- i.e. smell, touch, sight- to observe and describe your experience.  Be mindful of your present moment in this setting and breathe.

Be sure to nourish yourself daily. Food is not earned. Food is fuel and thus a necessity. Just like it's taxing to drive your car on empty, it's taxing on the brain to move throughout your day without food. If you consider yourself a busy person, heed the following suggestion: keep food in your car or personal bag. It's like having a spare big red gas can in your trunk for the unexpected journey into the woods. Keep food in arms reach, like in your center console, glove compartment, purse, or bag. Try sustainable snacks with high protein and natural sugars. Avoid dehydrating and unnaturally persevered foods. Some sustenance suggestions include jerky, nuts, dried fruit leathers and trail mixes, protein bars, crisp veggie snacks or coconut chips. Eat effectively. Avoid empty foods like candy and soda, or foods with lots of preservatives. Stick a few extra waters in your trunk for hydration. Make it easy on yourself.  If you do not have time to meal prep, use prepared snacks from places like Trader Joe's, Costco, or Target. The mindfulness is in the act of choosing to self care, not being perfect during the practice of self care.

Engage in pleasurable activities often.  Create a life worth living through building ongoing positive experiences.  If you are burdened by numbers at work, choose to do something creative with colors. If you are steeped in art at work, choose to bake or garden. There are so many activities that lend pleasurable experiences, some of which don't have to cost you a thing, including basketball at the local park, rearranging your furniture, watch your children play,  tend to your grooming and hygiene (i.e. shaving, trim nails), write a story,  pet your animal, and or play music or sing (this doubles as an exercise in breathing). Be mindful not to engage in pleasurable experiences that only include the opinion or satisfaction of others.

Finally,  laugh laugh laugh. Laughter has the power to change the brain and emotions. Give your brain a break while increasing positive emotional experiences.  Listen to funny pod casts, read a joke book, listen to stand up comedy, follow satirical news feeds, create or view silly memes, and absolutely practice belly laughs. Laughing mindfulness can be just the jolt you need when flooded with anger or panic.

Your worth is not defined by the self care techniques you choose. Self care rituals should be unique and personal. Commit only to the ones you believe you will use and will benefit you most. Choose one; practice often; and then add more rituals later. Be compassionate with yourself if you find it difficult to follow through. Thereafter, turn your mind to recommitment, and practice again.

Sending you health and healing, 
Dr. Oshi-Ojuri

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